"Yes, I can drink more wine and stay soberer than all the Men from Mars in a corporate galaxy! I'm *supernatural*, I'll live forever and remember it afterwards! I *cannot* be tracked on radar! I am a Thuggee, I am feared in the Tongs, I have the Evil Nose, I carry the Mojo Bag; I swam *Hong Kong* and didn't get wet! I'm a Crime Fighting Master Criminal, who'll try to blow me down? I wear nothing uniform, I wear *no* god damn uniform! I'm so ugly the Speed of Light can't slow me down and Gravity won't tug at my cuffs! YEE! YEEE!"
The Subgenius Brag Generator
From I AM THAT: Copper's Klatsch and Catch-All
Wondering what the hell a Subgenius brag is? Check out the Church of the Subgenius. Praise BoB!